Share this with your friends to mis-shift into their asses too!

How does the conversation always cycle back to BMWs? Each instance of a mildly divisive or otherwise open-ended inquiry being posed to the masses devolves into a discussion of those ubiquitous, inescapable symptoms of the universe and mankind’s hubris. An inevitable, ever recurring wave in the pool.

Anyway, welcome back to MSIMA Community Poll!

This week we reached out to the automotive community on matters of rage, confusion, and mild disheartening annoyance. That which you can never escape, for better or worse, and serves as an ever present reminder of your continued existence in the mortal realm. Your nemesis, and how it manifests in the automotive world.

Those such as – and I quote – the mere existence of bolts in tight spaces, the most recent person that cut you off, people not using their god damn blinker, going 10 under the speed limit in the leftmost lane which is meant for passing, the VW EA888 (all of it), and “my BMW for not letting me in and being a POS overall”. That is a nemesis.

Search your feelings and let the accusations fly! Let’s read some more.

Stampman

“Any Altima or Sentra as well, a little Kia soul too. That thing doesn’t have a soul.“

“On paper, they’re amazing vehicles, their designs pay homage to the classic iterations, they’re insanely powerful, and powered by huge V8s, which is pretty cool now that EVs and SUVs are the norm.
However, personally, they also represent the erosion of car culture as a whole, as it turns away from its roots in self-expression to mindless clout chasing, usually at the expense of other people. Look at those takeover videos. At least the Civic ricers in the early 2000s didn’t have much to play with, and their cars were agile. These modern Dodges are some of the biggest non-truck cars I’ve ever seen in real life, and have way more power than these immature, boneheaded fucks can manage. In many ways, I’d rather have the ricers over these Mopar knobs. Challengers and Chargers are like guns. They don’t want to kill people, but their shithead owners sure as hell do.”

“Every single thing on it is specific to a car which there are less than 6,000 of, and consumables are impossible to find. For example, when doing a clutch job, you must replace the clutch bolts. Ford decided these would be a size, pitch, and length unique ONLY TO THE SVT FOCUS so the only way to do a clutch job is to find new-old stock bolts from some dealer who forgot they stuffed them up their ass in 2006. This is one of many, many asinine pieces of this stupid engine.”

Jacob

“Subaru STIs. They sound bad, they’re fat, and they’re cashing in on pedigree they were rid of 20 years ago.“

“The people who drive them are nearly as tasteless as GTI people but twice as obnoxious. If I wanted a car that’s made 300 HP for the past two decades and only gotten fatter, I’d buy a C5 Corvette with an eating problem, not a shitty hatchback that thinks it’s a sports car.“

A very elusive friend of mine drives one, and every time I see this boring grey blob bearing the L, I have to do a double take and see if it’s them. They’re living in my head rent-free and I can’t evict them.
Having driven that fucking RX350, I’ve learned that they are nice. Too nice, in fact. Having been cursed with the shitbox lifestyle and the notorious Donkey Van, I’ve quickly realized that actual nice cars are completely alien to me.
I’m in a bad mood with Lexus in general, last time I had to wrench on one involved changing the oil and for whatever reason they decided it would be best to use a 2-piece canister filter which requires a special tool. That bitch was on there TIGHT, which led me to bracing myself against a control arm before it finally let go and I smashed my knuckles into the frame. Nice.”

Melody

“For me it’s not any car in particular, it’s anyone who defends full-automatics in sports cars. This is aside from people with disabilities that prevent them from fully enjoying their cars. They’re fine.“

“However, if you defend the deletion of manual transmissions simply cause you think the computer is faster, you deserve the worst. Life is not a drag strip, and as such, shift times do not matter. Anyone who races does it with a DCT, sequential or a manual, and they’re gonna be the first to tell you that it is a must-have for any sense of control. I’m consumed with the curse of loving the things people hate. Even worse, my love for the first gen Fiat Multipla.“

Skippy

“I cannot bring myself to love the 2020s BMWs. Everyone was hating on Bangle era cars ironically, but honestly? We owe the dude a fucking apology.”

“We should start dunking on this new era shit instead. It started with the pignosed G80 M4 – which is a good car, don’t get me wrong – I just don’t like how it looks and how prevalent it has become. Then the G70 7-Series came around. Then the iX, then the XM. Then we have the fat fuck supreme that is the G90 M5. Fat L after fat L.“

“When in reality their record improved in the 90s and 00s with the Twin Spark and FIRE engines. These cars still need to be worked on like any other, but look after ’em well and they’ll run for a long time. The only people that seem to perpetuate this are the Americans, where the market and network for ’em is very limited. Also snobs who drive German shite.”

“And I can’t stand 90% of BMW X-Series owners, they always drive like they’re entitled to go 100 in a 30. Nissan Rogue owners are also pretty ass. Turbo FRS, BRZ, and 86 guys also confuse me. You’ve spent how much versus just buying a Nissan Z car or WRX?”

Chromawave

“FUCKING TESLA DRIVERS. I FUCKING CAN’T!”

“Their lights are ALWAYS too fucking bright and aimed too high, and they constantly fucking cut people off like they own the world. I see videos where the autopilot straight up just makes illegal maneuvers AND DON’T GET ME STARTED ON THEIR FANBASE!”

Will

“For me its VW drivers. Especially Polos.”

“I have a pet hate for them after they wrote off my car.“

Zach

“Bro. GM ‘enjunears’ who are actually the dumbest fuckin smart people to ever walk the earth.”If I ever see you, you better be ready to feel my wrath. If they’ve proven to be one of the better lot, then I’ll maybe give them a chance. If I’m feeling generous.”

‘We figured out a compact V6 to put in our light truck and still have really good towing capacity, just hope the starter doesn’t go bad or you’ll spend an ENTIRE DAY replacing it because you have to remove the cat and UNBOLT THE MOTOR MOUNTS AND LIFT THE ENGINE to take it out.’
‘And we put that same V6 in an SUV with a transverse layout, but for this one we put the oil filter on the side of the motor right next to the fucking cat, also it splatters oil everywhere when you take it off.’
‘Oh so the EPA wants us to make smaller engines for our trucks? Let’s not use the V6 we have that actually works, let’s build an entirely new 4-cylinder that burns oil, then instead of actually designing it well, let’s just make it push THIRTY pounds of boost from the factory! We’ll just warranty them when they explode, no big deal!’
I will clock out right now and spend the rest of my day complaining.“

Mr. Big Cheese “Nukem” Horace

“I was gonna say Ford EcoSport, but it seems like I was beaten to it so, uh, Golf Mk8. Because it’s a literally a Mk7 that they somehow managed to fuck up and make generally worse. It’s built with lower quality materials, and the car feels like it’s running on hopes and dreams compared to a Mk7 which felt solid and well put together. Plus it looks like a Corolla.“

“And another one, the uh, Peugeot 504. Though it’s more of a personal reason. I lived under a dictatorship, and seeing a 504 on your street or doorstep meant that someone you knew was gonna disappear.“

This therapy session is adjourned, if anyone needs to keep talking I’ll be around back with my Newports.