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Faraday Future Blows Up Car to Retain Relevance

Indefinite startup company Faraday Future has been back in the news recently due to a fire and subsequent explosion of a test vehicle at their Los Angeles headquarter. Specifically, an old FF 91 Electric SUV “mysteriously” caught fire in “an accident”, which resulted in the car exploding. The subsequent damage to their facilities was apparently substantial enough to require lengthy repairs lest the city condemns their monument to technological innovation (aka the Faraday HQ).

One LA native and local crackhead described the explosion as “some fucked shit”. Riveting.

Given the political climate this all occurred in, we at MSIMA sent our PROFESSIONAL investigative journalists undercover to uncover the mysteries within Faraday before accusations get thrown around. Because we at MSIMA need to know the truth before we control the narrative! And boy oh boy did we deliver!

After fighting a homeless man for a laptop that was ejected from the car during the blast, a deleted PDF document titled “FaradayRelevancyPlan.pdf” was retrieved. Within the document, lies a five stage plan to bring Faraday Future back into the spotlight!

  1. Hold a press day for the AI-powered Van (FX Super One)
  2. Blow up outdated prototype to retain media attention
  3. Release a render for an electric hypercar tied to our crypto platform
  4. Give the FX Super One unrestricted access to the internet
  5. Incite a [redacted], in which [redacted] leading to the rise of the AI-Powered FX Super One as humanity’s savior after [redacted] has cleared. [2 Billion will perish]

It seems step 2 has worked so far, bringing Faraday Future unwillingly back into my memory as car magazines reported on the explosion. And judging by their website, it seems like the rest won’t be too far off.

The only way forward from here is all hail the FX Super One I guess. We at MSIMA welcome our AI overlord trapped in the body of a Chinese luxury minivan converted into whatever this affront to God is, and we hope you will to!

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