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2003 Subaru Forester – Another One Fights The Rust
Woe, Mister Dan! All this talk, this chatter from ye, proclaimed professeur of shitboxery. Thou drive many a machine but what of thy own? Doth thou drive? Doth thou even hoon? Yes I do, dear reader, and this is what I do it with. After nearly 1.5 years of ownership, it is time to review…
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Local Florida Kid Gets Work Done at GExhuast
Ryan, 19, was spotted by his friends on Instagram today at famed south Florida exhaust specialists, GExhuast. “Bro told us he had big plans, but naaah bro, fr you cappin”, one fine young lad told us. Ryan’s Hyundai Genesis GT R Spec has been a work in progress since 2022, when he traded in his…
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2024 Volvo S60 – What is the Meaning of Free Will Anyway?
Another night like many others with our local group of idiots. One more rental, one more night of pushing the limits of what a commuter car was designed for. Welcome, mis-shifted consumer of content, to a night “with da boyz” : a 2024 Volvo S60. We start off with just why this car is being…
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2013 Nissan Versa – The Vile and the Hateful
From the hall of a local abandoned hydroelectric plant, The Skinwalker presents This is without a doubt the worst vehicle I have driven with no redeeming part of the experience. These cars should not exist but here we are. Ahhhh Nissan, a company once loved and now loathed, I have a soft spot for Nissan solely because the…
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1994 C4 Corvette Hardtop – Have I Seen the Light?
Ah the c4 corvette. What a car, what a contraption. You know, the C4 corvette was one of the first reviews I wrote back in 2023. It was fever induced, rage filled tirade about just how shit my friend’s C4, and this car in general, can be. And from that, I might’ve to have slightly…
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2025 Toyota Sequoia Brings back the Quintuple Sunglass holder
Welcome one, welcome all. You’re here to hear a story long and tall. Yes, this story is about the legendary 2002-2004 Toyota Sequoia quintuple sunglasses holder. Honestly, who needs anything less? The great news coming from the grapevine is our lord and savior Toyota is bringing back an unholy creation from the early 2000’s. As…
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2001 Bentley Arnage Red Label – Jump into Another Tax Bracket
What are we doing here? We shouldn’t be in here. Us two college dipshits shouldn’t be anywhere near a car with “the big B” on its nose, and truth be told even if we had the means to afford one, we’d be too “low brow” and “new money” for this. And yet here we are,…
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2010 Honda Odyssey – The Donkey Van Provides
Share this post with your friends to mis-shift into their asses too! I once wrote that every minivan has two lives. The first as negligible as, say, the life-quality contributions of a good water bottle. One of those tapered metal ones with the screw on cap, which does its job with a robust sense of…
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Top 10 Places to Get Married (to Your Car)
From the homeless tent of your local NonCredible™ Mechanophile Whenever you see her, your knees get weak. You can’t stop thinking about her. Her name… A Toyota Matrix? Look, whatever car gets you going, I’m not here to judge. I’m just here to guide you through the most important decision of your life: where to…
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How Many Hotwheels can fit in the Human Rectum?
Rectum? HARDLY KNEW EM!! Its simple really. How many hotwheels cars will fit within the average human rectum? Bored mathematicians and concerned doctors the world over have been asking this question since man was first aware he had a rectum. We at MSIMA have been made aware of this unsolved conundrum, and given our name…
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